Changes in 2010

I am trying to keep with some New Years Resolutions this year so I changed/updated the look and title of this blog. Its hard to believe I started this blog before we knew if Paige was a boy or a girl and here we are already coming up on her 1 year birthday next month.

Here are some of my resolutions/goals:
1) Lose at least 20 pounds before September
2) Create a will with Hubby
4) Try to become a more positive person
5) Create new and exciting memories and traditions with my beautiful daughter

It's Paige's world we just live in it:)

Its been a busy couple of months that is for sure. I cant believe Christmas and New Years is over and done with already. The holidays are so much more exciting now that we have a little one to share it with. Paige is doing great right now. She is on the verge of walking any day now. She creeps all over the house by holding onto different pieces of furniture and toys. She can stand on her own unassisted for longer periods of time and she is getting very brave. Any day now she is going to let go and just start walking:) She also scoots on her butt when sitting down to get to where she needs to go. She took after her month and never crawled which I think it hysterical. At first I was obsessing about this and why she wasn't following the What to Expect the First Year milestones to a tee. But finally I realized she is her own person and she will do everything when ready. I remember over the summer when DH's aunt was watching her for us. She has 4 kids of her own and we often call her the guru because she has pretty much tackled everything when it comes to kids. Anyway at that point I happened to be stressing because I didn't think Paige was vocal enough at 6months. After expressing my concern she loving looked at me and said "Courtney they all walk and talk by the time they go to pre-school." At the time it didn't mean much but I often go back to that statement. It is SO true. I realized she is her own person and will do what she wants when she is ready. I will not push her to crawl if she prefers to scoot on her butt:) And as for being vocal well lets just say my house is filled with MANY LOUD noises coming from her all day long HAHAHA

Her ears continue to be a problem. We saw an ENT and decided tubes are the best option SO she will have the surgery 1/21/10. I realize we literally have no other option at this point but I worry for her and don't ever want her to feel pain. I pray everything will go fine and she will recover quickly.

Why do children have to get teeth or have ears?

OMG we are having issues.......Paige seems to be cutting teeth like its her day job. This of course is great but it makes her cranky and I cant stay I blame her. She will put something in her mouth and then all of a sudden cry. My poor baby

EARS!!! Still having issues with these damn ears. We are on our 4th antibiotic and now the infection is in the left ear rather than the right. The doctor said "wow that one looks like it hurts" I feel so bad for my little angel. She is sleeping very restlessly probably because her damn ear is killing her.....so needless to say we are off to a specialist. I see tubes in her future but don't really want to say that out loud. I am thankful she doesn't have anything more serious or a raging fever. Fevers scare the crap out of me for young infants.

Halloween was great this year. My in-laws came over to help us with the door. we get a TON of kids so it would not be possible for us to walk her around without someone Manning the door. We had homemade tortellini soup and warm rum cider drinks YUMMMMM We put Paige in her fairy Halloween costume and walked her around our neighborhood. It was a great night and just seems to make the holidays so much more enjoyable!!!

Thoughts

Ahhhhhhhh what a couple of weeks it has been. Paige just cant seem to stay healthy. First we cancel our trip to Florida due to a nasty ear infection and now she has another one or the same one that just didn't clear up. She has been pulling on the ear and i knew something was up but it didn't seem to bother her unless she was tired. I thought perhaps it was just a habit she had started. Then Tuesday night I knew something wasn't right. I picked her up from daycare and she immediately fell asleep in the car. Normally she would wake up smiling and laughing but not this time. WOOHOO she was pissed. She felt warm and sure enough she had a temp. Panic mode starts to set in, you see I am deathly afraid of swine flu at this point. I think about it constantly so the second she gets even a low grade temp I freak!!!!. After getting her down at 8pm I decided our rectal thermometer wasn't working and needed one for the night because what if she woke up roasting and I didn't have an accurate thermometer. So off I went to Rite Aid at 8:30pm on a cold rainy Wednesday night. While driving through "town" i spot a popular restaurant/bar on the right with a few young looking girls outside smoking cigarettes and laughing their asses off. And then I realize..........WOW how life has changed. 5 years ago I was that girl. Out on a Wednesday night laughing and having a good time without a care in the world. Now I am the stressed out mom who is slightly over weight and frantically driving to Rite Aid to get a RECTAL THERMOMETER. When did that happen I ask myself?

Sleeping has been alittle tough because Paige is not sleeping well. At 4:30am she started stirring. I scooped her up and brought her in bed with me. This has become our new routine and we both enjoy it. Usually if I do this she will sleep until 6 or even 7. I semi-sleep and just watch her sleep most of the time. Our position is always the same. We both turn our bodies to face each other basically nose to nose. I can feel her breath on my face and its so peaceful. Sometimes she will reach out for me and just lay her hand on my face. This morning we both woke up at the same time. So there we are at 5:30am in the morning staring at each other.....nose to nose. I say "Hi Baby girl" she puts the biggest smile on her face and makes alittle coo and I MELT. By far the best moment I have had in a while. At that point I realized our bond is so strong. I am by far her favorite person and she is mine. At some point this will change and she wont even want to be seen with me but for right now we are totally BFF's:)

I miss her

We are coming off a very long weekend. It was the Bills homeopener so of course we had out of town guest. Michele & Brendan came in from Milford and Pat came in from Providence. Michele watched Paige on Friday and she did great. Paige was super happy and even took a 2 1/2 hour nap for Michele in her crib. (what a good girl) Mil took Paige Saturday morning for her first swimming lession at the YMCA. She did really well, I will go to watch them next Saturday. Marilynn had her overnight Saturday and Sunday. Yesterday I started to miss her and today I just cant stand it. I cant wait to get out of here at 4:30 to go get her. My little Angel.......she is just an amazing kid. Its amazing how soon you forget what it took to make her, carry her, deliver her. But I would do it 10 times over if it meant getting the same beautiful result. I will have her alot this week on my own. Jonesey is working crazy hours at work and a few overnights. All to myself and I dont even care if she up all night..........:) Well maybe I do alittle because I do still have to go to work.

Here I am again

Wow I cant believe Paige is 7 months old this Saturday!!!! What a long road it has been for us. She just started sleeping through the night about 3 weeks ago. She has a cold currently which makes her cranky but for the most part she is the most amazing child I have ever seen (probably because she is my own:) She continues to amaze me every day with something new. Makes life so wonderful and gives it a purpose. She is everything and more I hoped she would be.

I am still dealing with major anxiety in regards to her, her health, well being, development etc..... Why cant I just let go and enjoy. Someone once told me not to wish away her milestones. Its so true. I am always saying "when she can crawl, walk, talk, ride a bike........I forget all the milestones she has already hit. Sitting up, saying babababa,mamamamama (once), giggling so much her sides hurt, eating solids like a big girl, sitting in her highchair, holding her own bottle. Ahhh where have these 7 months gone.

Last night we were walking the Bills against the Pats and she was laughing and standing with some assistance and hubby and I were laughing so hard because she was cracking up so much. It sounds stupid but was a great moment. She is and always be the center of our life. As long as she is happy and healthy I am good........


Love you little girl
Momma

4 weeks to go!!!

Wow the weeks still seem to be flying by. I think the key is to keep working as long as possible. Here we are at 35 weeks and still going strong. I am tired and sore and sleeping is pretty much out of the question. But I am happy Paige is still in there and healthy. I had my Buffalo show this past weekend and my mom was here to help getting things organized. The nursery looks amazing and it only needs small finishing touches at this point. We had an appointment with Dr. Fraas last week and she answered a lot of questions. I am officially done with Dr. White and the sonograms. (this makes me sad) Now it is just a waiting game. I have 2 1/2 weeks left of work and then a week of rest. We are so excited to meet Paige.

I will write next week

We love you Paige

Mommy